New year resolutions

RealBlurPolitics®: Ever wondered how a politician's new year resolution look like? Read on to find out

PM
I hope I can have a pay raise this year but I must think of some ways to earn those money from the citizens first. Maybe I should increase property prices to absorb more money. Then retrench some civil servants to prove to people that those working for the government do not have metal rice bowls. Isn't that killing two birds with one stone?

Home Affairs minister
My wish is very direct and it is to hope that Mas Selamat will be caught or I might get sacked. I also wish that my little people will not let me down anymore and let criminals escape so easily. I want all windows in government buildings to have grilles. Lastly, I want to grow taller

Education minister
As the economy is rather bad now, I wish that all schools can cut down on costs involving less crucial things like student welfare and plan more activities which will make students pay more. As for the new seven thousand five hundred teachers which we will be hiring this year, I hope they can all agree to settle for a lower pay where we will tell a white lie saying that as they have little or no experience, so that is their starting pay which is rather little

Foreign Affairs minister
I want to change my position as foreign affairs minister, flying around the world every now and then has made me lose quite a lot of hair. I wish I was Information, Communications and the Arts minister. Look at that skinny guy, his hair is still intact even though he's over sixty which means that job should be easier and I heard he is stepping down this year, so here's my chance

Transport minister
I wish those poly students would stop complaining about their high transport fares. Maybe I should discuss with my colleagues from other ministries to offer them some perks that will silence them for the time being. Something should also be done to solve the ERP problem, never mind, I think I'll leave that to next year when more money is collected

Thaksin Shinawatra
When can I ever return to the land of a thousand smiles? I miss drinking my tom yam soup and watching muay thai on TV, the King is ignoring me forever. In the meantime, let me do some football club shopping, which EPL club should I buy next? With the experience at Manchester City, I think I can buy a better one now

Barack Obama
Everyone is saying I am thin or whatever. I hope to train those skinny legs of mine to be more muscular so that Arnold Schwarzenegger will not laugh at me again. I hope to hire a couple of bodyguards who are good at catching shoes, in case the same thing which happened to Bush happen to me

Chen Shui Bian
I am innocent. Can somebody believe me? Those ingrates, when I was president they bootlicked me, now I am a nobody, they want me arrested. Where is justice and fairness in this world?

Abdullah Badawi
Let me pray that Uncle Mahathir will reduce the number of criticism he has on me. Anyway, I am going to hand over to Brother Najib in March although I am sort of forced to do so. Just three more months to freedom, I can endure it, yes I can

Anwar Ibrahim
My Pakatan Rakyat will go all out to defeat the Barisan Nasional and I am going to be PM to see Mahathir off to jail and make sure he suffer a worse fate than me. People are starting not to believe me after I did not do what I said last year so I am going to gain back their trust