Po Chai Pills

Taken from Wikipedia

Do you know Po Chai pills? The one which people consume as diarrhoea medication. It may look humble with its traditional packaging and design and don't underestimate its ability to cure your upset stomach.

Anyway, I thought of a joke about Po Chai pills today and shall share it with you all here. Don't worry, it's not going to be disgusting.

Once upon a time, there was a Singaporean Ah Beng and an ang moh from America. Let's call the Singaporean as Beng and the American as James.

James: Damn it, I took those pills from the clinic but am still having the runs.

Beng (hands out two bottles of po chai pills): Try these out, take two.

James agreed and went home with the po chai pills.

The next day James complained to Beng again

James: Hey, those pills were useless too

Beng: Did you take two of them?

James: Of course I did, how long later should I take another two?

Beng: Huh? But I only gave you two!

James: I took two beads, there are still lots of them left!!!

Champions League Final

Man Utd's Park Ji-Sung doing a K-pop dance together with Pedro of Barcelona

Damn David Villa, why must his leg be so itchy and go score that third goal for Barcelona? If the score remained at 2:1 until the final whistle, I would have pawned Singapore Pools for good this time.

Honestly, my first prediction was Manchester United losing 3:1 but I was quite certain that it is not going to happen. So I decided on betting the exact score of 2:1 to Barcelona. I was pretty close but yet so far.

Lionel Messi has, once again, proven that he is the best footballer of his generation with an excellent goal and a magnificent performance. He must be kissing that pair of soccer boots he wore for the final on his bed last night.

By the way, I refuse to congratulate Barcelona on winning the trophy. Instead, I would like to say "Boo" to Manchester United and all its fans. Make England lose face only, not once but twice.

Champions League Final

Will Barcelona lift the cup again after two years or will Man United avenge for their defeat in 2009?

After much consideration, research and logical thinking, I have decided on what to bet for the Uefa Champions League final and have done it earlier today. I am going to be superstitious and not reveal what my bet is until the match is over.

However, if you know me and understand who I like or detest in football, it is not difficult to guess what my selection is. Even if I did not bet, it is also relatively easy to predict which team am I going to support for one day.

All I can say is that the undisputed best club in the world with the planet's best footballer and play with skill and beauty will win the Champions League? What were you thinking? I'm talking about Liverpool here! Why aren't they in the final?

I am not going to watch the match. I don't see the importance in it to sacrifice my sleep time. Hope those who watch it will have an entertaining and exciting time.

Peugeot Quality Time

This is a very cool commercial. I only watched it once on TV but decided to search for the video in Youtube and post it here to share with you all.

Making money

Earlier in the day, Janice smsed me (and many of her friends) informing that she has a couple of tickets to the K-Pop Heal The World 2011 concert in Singapore and she is selling them, at half the original price.

My first reaction was to just buy them at this drop-dead-gorgeous price and sell it off at an obscene amount in the black market. I might probably be able to profit more than three hundred percent from this thought.

Well, thinking twice, I decided not to. Most likely, I would have to create an account on ebay or post threads in numerous forums to "advertise".

I can get someone I know to post for me on ebay but that would mean less money entering my pockets. Also, I don't want to end up selling the tickets to somebody I know when we meet.

You never know who is who on the Internet. The good (ok maybe not so good) impression people have of me will be gone after the transaction. What if that person goes around telling other about me?

Alright, maybe I am overly paranoid. Such a good chance to make money and you still choose to decline? No wonder I am still not rich until now.

But being rich in terms of money is not all about life.

Water Tank

Most of you would have known about the news of that certain block in Woodlands which had a corpse in one of its water tanks by now.

Residents complain, make noise and unwilling pay that lucky owner of the provision shop downstairs to buy mineral water. SO what else can be done? I heard that every household is entitled to a compensation of ten lousy bucks only.

1. Sack the town council?

It was proposed by some of the people staying in that block but that is highly unlikely because this is a constituency under the lightning party. No responsibility is required. Honestly, if the town council deserves the sack, the one at my Clementi neighbourhood should have been fired long ago.

2. Sack the MP?

Sadly, the unlucky MP for this group of unlucky residents is a newbie who just started his political career in the recent elections. Chances are he will ask PUB for their "opinion" and divert the noise to other authorities but still get $15000 a month.

3. More compensation?

If you ask an eight year old kid, he will probably tell you that ten bucks is inadequate to even buy him a Transformers toy. I propose the compensation to be multiplied by at least ten times.

$100 is a fair and square amount, regardless of how many heads and legs (animals included) there are in each flat. The MP should also every house and deliver a carton of mineral water. Ah, wait a minute, elections are already over.

4. Waiver of utilities bill.

I propose that the whole block of residents enjoy a waiver of water bill for one month. This would be a good move to placate and pacify the financially-drained, mentally-traumatized and psychologically-shocked people and make them drink the water again (since it's free and they are Singaporeans)

5. Compensate a new flat

Hahaha, fat hope! Actually, I do know of somebody who happens to be staying at that now unpopular block in Woodlands and that is what he wished for. Maybe the MP and his bootlicking grassroots leaders should move there and prove to everybody that the water is safe for consumption.

Too bad, elections have concluded or else you will see all kinds of wayangs to "help" the affected residents.

NBA

Yeah, Oklahoma City Thunder beats Dallas Mavericks to level the score at 1:1. I hope Mavericks will lose because they defeated LA Lakers in the semi-final.

New Cabinet

How can I not talk about the new ministers of Singapore? Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong announced a big change to his cabinet this afternoon. Here are the changes and my reactions to them.

Deputy Prime Ministers: Teo Chee Hean, Tharman Shanmugaratnam

Seriously, do we really need not one but two assistants to the Prime Minister? Why does Mr Lee need two back-ups? What is he trying to state? He still needs more support?

Speaking of which, Tharman is the obvious choice to become the next DPM in the post-Wong Kan Seng (shall talk about him later) era. He has the brains and vision to be the second highest-ranking person in the government.

As for Teo Chee Hean, the probability of him taking over as Prime Minister in the future is even higher now with the latest reshuffle.

Defence Minister: Ng Eng Hen

Not much of a surprise. He is expected to be "transferred" to another ministry after a disappointing performance as Education minister. The Defence Ministry is no doubt his next destination.


Finance Minister: Tharman Shanmugaratnam

It's Tharman again! That is a brace for this guy. Let's see how much more hair will he drop from all the counting and calculating of figures.


Foreign Minister: K. Shanmugam

Not much of a surprise either since there are very limited choices in parliament. I thought Lim Hng Kiang would take over George Yeo aka the scapegoat for this post though.


Home Affairs Minister: Teo Chee Hean

From the armed forces to the police force, Teo would be a reliable bet for his new position. Wong Kan Seng would need to learn a thing or two from him.

National Development Minister: Khaw Boon Wan

Hahaha! The shortie Mah Bow Tan has been kicked out and replacing him is another unpopular shortie PAP minister! Khaw does not seem to be the best choice as housing minister though.

I wonder if he will be able to decrease HDB flat prices to as low as $8. Go google "khaw boon wan eight dollar" if you don't understand what I mean.

Law Minister: K. Shanmugam

Another Indian minister scores a brace! It is 99.99% expected that Shanmugam would continue to head the law ministry. As Law Minister, he has been rather "dormant" so appointing him as the schedule-packed foreign affairs minister was a wise move.

Health Minister: Gan Kim Yong

There is a high chance that Gan will screw up the healthcare system of Singapore like what Khaw Boon Wan did. Polyclinic prices are not going to go down because he took over the health ministry.

He needs to learn how to slim down first before becoming a health minister.


Transport Minister: Lui Tuck Yew

Raymond Lim is gone as well. Well, a good punishment for him anyway. Raymond (with the surname Lim) has been boasting about increasing bus and train frequencies every now and then when he was minister but we all know that he's lying.

Lui is a decent choice for this challenging job but I still think that he will not be able to resolve the ERP issue. MRT trains will still be equally packed in the near future.

Manpower Minister: Tharman Shanmugaratnam

It's a hat-trick for Tharman! I wonder if his salary will triple whilst holding three different portfolios in the cabinet.

Tharman will only be holding this position on a temporary basis. Expect this post to be taken over by someone else within the next three years.

Trade and Industry Minister: Lim Hng Kiang

No change. Lim is one of the few quiet ministers who prefer to shun away from the limelight. A good strategy indeed as he managed to keep his job without producing much good news.

Education Minister: Heng Swee Kiat

Who the hell is he? He was the former managing director of the Monetary Authority of Singapore and only joined politics at this year's elections. And now, he's going to become a millionaire minister!

Swee Kiat, you are damn Heng although I don't understand why the PM chose you.

Environment and Water Resources Minister: Vivian Balakrishnan

Vivian deserves to be given the boot as well but I guess he was given one last chance as he is still "young". Expect to see some creative yet sustainable proposals by him during his reign.

Information, Communication and Arts Minister: Yaacob Ibrahim

No comments.

Community Development, Youth and Sports (Acting) Minister: Chan Chun Sing

What the hell is this guy doing in the cabinet? He did not even contest a single election in his life and is now a minister (never mind the word 'acting")?

Two thumbs down for this appointment. The worst decision of all. Hope he will not follow Mah Bow Tan's footsteps in the future.

Ministers in Prime Minister’s Office: Lim Swee Say, S Iswaran

Lim Swee Say still holds the unglamorous title of minister without portfolio with a new partner this time. Iswaran, with his new appointment, looks set to be part of the PAP suicide squad in Aljunied GRC at the next elections.


Emeritus Senior Minister: Goh Chok Tong

The biggest joke has to be saved for the last. Now what is Emeritus Senior Minister? Why not call Fandi Ahmad as Emeritus Striker of the national football team then?

I shall exclude the ministers of state as those are just small-fry.

Lastly, I would like to say, George Yeo, you are not alone.

So Klose

Miroslav was so Klose yet so far. An incredibly bad season for Bayern Munich indeed. Well, Liverpool is always there to accompany them.

Blogskin and new games

After one whole month of contemplating, I have decided to stick with the current blogskin because of three reasons.

Number one, I like this blogskin. Number two, readers like this blogskin. Number three, I am too lazy to look for another one and don't want to risk being criticized for finding an inferior one.

I have also added some games to this blog once again in an attempt make it a more entertaining experience for visitors. Please click on the games at the left and try them out. Feel free to give feedback like whether are they fun, is the loading time too long etc.

More plans to the site will be announced and implemented in the near future so do visit this blog frequently.

The same question

Many many people, so many that I have lost count how many were there, have asked me this question. A question about me where I do not have a definite answer. When are you enlisting?

Sometimes, when I can't be bothered to answer it for the nth time, I would just shoot back the universal "I don't know". If I am in a good mood, I might joke around and say that I am too precious to be risked in a war, that's why they excluded me.

After answering that question, I would ask myself, do I need to inform him/her when I receive that sacred orange letter? Then I would continue to shoot another question in my brain, so how many people do I need to inform in total?

Also, so what if I inform them? Are they going to have big reactions? "Oh Raymond, let me treat you to a scrumptious meal first, the food inside there is bad" or "I will buy you a non-camera phone as a gift before you enlist".

You might argue that informing them is a means of contacting and communicating. I beg to differ. So what if I told them? Will they make the first move and call me after half a year to ask what is my vocation?

The answer is pretty obvious. Well, this is all part of human nature. People ask me such a question because they ran out of topics to talk about. So being pretentious has become the norm for everybody. I stay quiet or away from the crowd every now and then as I dislike being a hypocrite.

You might strongly disagree with what I state but that will only further justify that I am correct.